Vietnam is 1,650km from top to bottom and about 50km wide at its narrowest. That shape is the reason it has three distinct climates, three quite different cuisines, and a travel-planning problem that catches almost everyone: there is no month when the whole country is at its best.
The season problem, first
The north — Hanoi, Ha Long, Sapha — has four seasons. Cold, damp and grey from December to February, hot and humid June to August, and pleasant in March–April and October–November.
The centre — Hue, Hoi An, Da Nang — is hot and dry February to May, and its rainy season runs September to December, with serious flooding in October and November. Hoi An’s old town floods most years.
The south — Ho Chi Minh City, the Mekong — is hot all year, with a dry season December to April and afternoon downpours May to November.
The best compromise months are March–April and, at a push, October, when the north and centre are both reasonable and the south is fine.
The north
Hanoi is the more interesting of the two big cities: a dense old quarter of thirty-six streets each historically dedicated to one trade, French colonial architecture gone soft with damp, lakes in the middle of town, and a street-food culture that runs from dawn.
Eat: phở for breakfast, which is when it is eaten; bún chả, grilled pork in broth with noodles, which is a Hanoi dish; chả cá, turmeric fish with dill; and cà phê trứng, egg coffee, which sounds wrong and is not.
Ha Long Bay is spectacular and heavily trafficked. Lan Ha Bay and Bai Tu Long, adjacent and part of the same limestone karst system, have a fraction of the boats. Overnight on a boat rather than a day trip.
Ninh Binh, two hours south, is the same karst formations in flooded rice paddies, reachable by rowing boat and bicycle, and is many people’s favourite place in the country.
Ha Giang, in the far north on the Chinese border, is the best motorbike route in Southeast Asia — a three or four-day loop through limestone mountains and minority villages. Increasingly it must be ridden with a local “easy rider” for licensing reasons.
Sapa is rice terraces and hill-tribe trekking, and is now considerably more developed than its reputation.
The centre
The narrow waist, and the part with the history.
Hue was the imperial capital under the Nguyen dynasty. The Citadel, badly damaged during the 1968 Tet Offensive and under long restoration, and the royal tombs strung along the Perfume River. The food is the most refined in Vietnam — imperial court cooking, small dishes, and bún bò Huế, which is the best noodle soup in the country and is not phở.
Hoi An is a preserved trading port — Japanese, Chinese and European merchants for four centuries — that survived because the river silted and the trade moved to Da Nang. Lanterns, tailors who will make a suit in two days, and cao lầu, a noodle dish that is supposed to require water from one specific well.
It is very touristed and it is still worth it. Rent a bicycle and get out to the beach and the rice paddies in the early morning.
The Hai Van Pass between Hue and Da Nang is one of the great coastal roads, best on a motorbike or from the train, which runs right along the shoreline.
Phong Nha, inland, has the largest caves in the world including Son Doong, which requires a permit, considerable money and a multi-day expedition. The accessible caves nearby are extraordinary and cost very little.
The south
Ho Chi Minh City — still widely called Saigon — is faster, hotter, more commercial and less charming than Hanoi. The War Remnants Museum is unflinching and presents a perspective most Western visitors have not encountered; the Cu Chi tunnels are a half-day.
Eat: bánh mì, the Franco-Vietnamese sandwich, which is a southern thing; cơm tấm, broken rice with grilled pork; and the southern version of phở, which is sweeter and comes with more herbs.
The Mekong Delta — floating markets at Cai Rang, orchards, and a homestay if you have two days. Day trips from the city are rushed.
Phu Quoc and the coastal towns are the beach option; Con Dao, a former prison island, is the quieter and more interesting one.
Getting around
The Reunification Express runs the length of the country and the Da Nang–Hue section is one of the best rail journeys in Asia. Book soft sleeper.
Internal flights are cheap and save days on the Hanoi–Da Nang–Saigon legs.
Sleeper buses are cheap, ubiquitous and have flat beds designed for people rather shorter than the average northern European.
Motorbikes are how the country moves. They are also the most common cause of serious injury to travellers here — see the health guide and check your insurance actually covers you, which it almost certainly does not on a car licence.
Practical
Visa requirements have changed repeatedly. Vietnam’s e-visa now covers most nationalities for up to 90 days; check current rules rather than an old blog.
Two to three weeks is the right length for the full country. Ten days means picking two of the three regions.
Crossing the road in Hanoi or Saigon: walk slowly and predictably into the traffic and do not stop. The scooters flow around you. Stopping suddenly is what causes accidents.